Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Don't count. . .

It's been WAY too long since I've blogged. But I have a few (and I mean a few) minutes in my incredibly crazy life! Let's see, in the past few months we have had a lot of things happen - good and bad. Geoff was put on work 'furlow' (a nice way of saying laid off!) til Feb. 25th. Sucks but we have my teaching to help support us. Geoff is playing Mr. Mom - hates it, but does a great job. He does all the house cleaning and carpooling while I teach. I've been blessed with 4 new students and Hale Centre Theatre (my new fav work place) has been employing me as a music director and sound board operator. We were concerned about the holidays but it's going to be just fine.
This past weekend I had a complete meltdown! Sunday morning I had a music committee meeting at 8am and then a youth choir practice (I'm accompanying) at 9am. Then when I got home, I had to get the 'baptism bag' together for Geoff's primary kid who was baptized the day before. Showers for everyone (not much hot water for those of us at the end), hair done, teeth brushed and a stick of gum for those fasting, dressed - shirts tucked in, shoes found, my makeup and then grab my hymnbook and RUN to church in order to make it on-time to play prelude. We have "claimed" the front row on the side where the organ is so I don't have walk to far after I play the organ and then have to return for the closing song. When we get there another family took it. I know they aren't assigned but it bothered me since they knew we always sat there. Oh well - to the back, which by now is the middle of the cultural hall. I don't like to play very loud on the organ before the meeting. I find it just makes the pre-church gab even louder. It can be heard but you have just listen. Our ward has been really encouraging everyone to show up and be reverent before the meeting. Well, I begin playing Christmas hymns. No one was listening - I can almost guarantee it! I just play and ignore the noise. Well, try to. The bishopric comes in and sits on the stand. I thought for sure the noise would quiet down - nope. It just continues. I finally just stop playing. They didn't even notice!! When the member of the bishopric stood up to conduct, he looked at me and nodded for me to stop. He didn't even notice!! AAAHHH!! I was almost done then. Well, I came to the meeting for one reason - the sacrament. The meeting went on - no thanks to the music people. Oh well. Sacrament passed and the deacon forgot me! Got the chorister but not me! That was the straw that broke the camel's back. Afterwards I went and sat with Geoff. My kids were extremely noisy and annoying today. Just couldn't sit still. Had to take Kylee out and talk to her about setting an example. Not my idea of fun. After the last testimony was said, I started my "trek" back to the front. There was a pause waiting for me to get situated at the organ. OH WELL! Deal with it! You took my row! By the way, that family has little ones and left early in the meeting! AAAH!!! After the closing prayer, the noise went right back to where it was. I played through one hymn and closed up. None of the bishopric even said thanks or hello today. I know it's a thankless job - always has been. But if you have ever been to a meeting with music- it's weird! Do your music peeps a favor and tell them thank you! We miss all the visiting before and after the meetings and feel very left out a lot! Don't forget them! As I walked off the stand, the choir director (someone who I would consider a very 'hard' person and not one to just visit with) stopped me and asked if I was ok. That was it - - I started to bawl! She held me and I cried. I had just been too stressed! Too much work, not enough time and carrying the weight of all the financial woes, on top of being forgotten completely (including the sacrament) at church - just too much! I excused myself and rushed by Geoff saying "I'm going - love you" and ran out of the bldg. I sat in the van and cried for about 5 minutes. Unable to drive because I couldn't see. Geoff came out and offered to drive me home. We got home and he snuggled with me on the couch as I poured it all out! I haven't cried like that in a long time! I cried myself to sleep and he covered me up with a blanket and then cleaned up the house. He fixed dinner and when I woke up, he had a Sonic Dr. Pepper for me. I told him I was fasting, to which he replied "I think the Lord will forgive you! Enjoy!" I love that man!! I'm better now - still plugging along! :)
more later . . . .

3 comments:

Laurie M. said...

Yay! I'm so glad to have you back in the blogging world since you are the one that started me on this stuff in the first place. Sorry that things are so tough right now. I know how stressful it is to be the sole wage-earner when you feel like your place is at home with the kids. But you are blessed with a beautiful talent that allows you to enjoy your work! And a hubby who takes such good care of you and your family. The loud chatting before the meeting starts always bugs me because I like to listen to the prelude music and be ready for the sacrament, but I'll admit I've never thanked the people who provide it- I'll be sure to do that next Sunday. Have a great day!

Crazymamaof6 said...

huge bummer! that is so lame . and i can't believe he dogged you with the sacrament! i know it is a huge stress for you right now and then meetings and ignoring. such a huge bummer. i added you to my google reader so i will be alerted to your posts. glad you are back to bloggin' missed ya! (((hugs!))) just keep swimming! and i am a fan of crying. sometimes you just have to let it all out.

Courtney said...

I totally hear you about church! I am all for assigned seats MAN! Especially for those who sit on the stand and make our sacrament meeting the spirital meeting it needs to be! Keep playing your music - I can hear it and I LOVE the spirit that it brings to the meeting - we sit way in the back and I NOTICED that there was no prelude when I got to church on Sunday - now I know why...you are awesome and though you don't feel it, I know that you are appreciated. I am amazed at your ablitity and talent to play the music for sacrament meeting (I get so nervous accompanying)! Geoff is awesome - so glad you have a good man to stand by your side and do whatever it takes to lift your spirits - OH YEAH on the Sonic DP! You Rock! Check out my blog www.themiliusbunch.blogspot.com